Honesty is everything. It is the foundation of decency, good moral, dignity, and one’s standing among his fellow human beings.
We may have everything – knowledge, talents, skills, fortunes, fame and reputation – that makes everyone look up to us in admiration and envy. But without honesty, everything is hollow and fragile like a palace made of sand on the beach. The sure high tide of the day is going to wipe it out without a trace.
I learned of it first hand and the hard way, my friends.
I had every decent thing anymore could ever want in a decent life. But I was either too proud or too insecure to admit that like everyone else I too had my own inherent imperfections and weaknesses. I was too tight-lipped and too guarded about the things I didn’t want others to know about me.
Now I am paying – and paying it dearly – the lies I had told others and myself that no matter how much good I have or have done might never be enough to repay the debts I have incurred myself.
I hope this confession will help me repay the debts – if not all, then perhaps some of them. At least, the debts of inner peace and happiness I owe myself so that I may begin the process of making myself into a better person. I’ll be more than grateful and indeed be immensely humbled if it can also heal wounds I have inflicted upon others and be forgiven for the harms and incursions I have made on their lives.
Like anybody else, I’m not perfect or faultless. That much is obvious. I need to accept myself the way I am and be humble and human about my own humanity. I need to find courage in accepting what others may think or feel about me and my imperfections. I need to find the baseline from which I can truly measure myself, my efforts and my achievements and appreciate them for what they are.
May the new beginning begin and the best of ends be secured in the end.